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Extra
Cost analysis? Stay childless
Readers fire back harsh judgment against MSN Money columnist and potential mom MP Dunleavey for using a detailed cost-benefit analysis to decide about having a baby.
By MSN Money Staff
Parenthood nearly scares MP Dunleavey to death.
Recently she boiled down the financial impact of having a baby in her column "Kids: Bad investments, big returns."
Calculating the cost of child rearing, exploring the return on investment as well as coming to the conclusion that sometimes money doesnt always matter, triggered a firestorm of reaction to MSN Money's e-mail folder:
I don't think that MP Dunleavey deserves to have a child. I cannot believe in this day and age that people actually sit down and figure how much it's going to cost them to have a family. I have a 13-year-old son who has given me endless hours of joy and is a constant source of pride. He is one of the best things that ever happened to me, and being a mother is the most important job in the world to me. Tell MP Dunleavey that she better stay childless so that she and her husband have more time and money to sit around and count it. We have a wonderful family and what we have cannot be measured in dollars and cents but by the heart.
Ridiculous, the simple fact that people have written this article speaks volumes of the cultural climate of this country. The article refers to spending emotional energy and time. The use of spend implies that you are doing it to get something in return. Very dangerous. However, its seen all the time these days -- parents spending more money instead of time.
Kids should not be thought of as an "investment" for financial reward, but as an "investment" into a loving family. If you continue to look at a child as a dent in your retirement account then you should not have children. However, I am pretty sure that once you hear the heartbeat for the first time, hold him/her for the first time and realize that God gave you the ability to create a tiny piece of both of you, you'll look at that child in a way you could never imagine, in a way that doesn't have money attached to it.
Related news and commentary on MSN Money
I just read the article Kids: bad investments, big returns and it scares me to think there are actually people like those in the study you referenced. I am 25-years-old and have 6-year-old twin daughters and an 11-month-old daughter and every day I get up and go to work thinking about going home to them. Nothing is as important, not money, not my career (which I love), not even my husband (who I love dearly). Those kids are my life and I dont regret or question my choice to have them.
I liked the end of your article. That "little voice" is being a human being. Having children isn't just something we rationalize (you can, but that's not the point). It's part of continuing the human race and is ingrained in us. "Culture" doesn't force us to buy all of the junk we see on the market. It's because we love our children so much. "Culture" may just be the wonderful marketing that's out there, but there's no one actually forcing us to buy stuff.
If you need to do a cost-benefit analysis on having children, then you shouldn't be having them.
I truly do believe finances need to be considered when having children; but you cannot weigh loving and nurturing with a real monetary value. I am sure this writer does not think of all the money she has wasted on things that are less important until after that fact. I am a mother of two and I cant even begin to imagine what my life would be like without them at any cost. So, if its security you want dont venture down that road because with children comes the unexpected. But when youre old, what would you rather have to put a smile on your face?
Defending MP: Baby-cost backlash too much
The first wave of reader reaction to MPs column Kids: Bad investments, big returns has triggered a new rush of readers who take on MPs critics in Defending MP: Baby-cost backlash too much. Click here for more.
MP, do us all a favor and do not procreate. The last thing our world needs is another child with selfish parents who are concerned about money, money, money. If you were really on the fence about having a child, read your article again. You are way too self-absorbed to nurture a child. The sacrifices parents make aren't demoralizing -- they are empowering. Enjoy your portfolio in your retirement. My husband and I have been able to set up a portfolio and have children -- so while you are counting your monies in 20 years I will be receiving kisses from my future grandchildren, which my dear, are priceless.
I have thought of the cost of raising a child many times. I was raised with siblings and would like to have more than one so my child may experience the same memories as I have. The sad part is I worry about how much it is going to cost and want to give my children everything they need to survive and I'm not sure how possible that is with having more than one child.
I am disgusted and appalled that one would consider a cost benefit analysis of having children! Either you want children or you dont. They are not merely a financial burden. Parents value their lives with children and dont feel as if theyre suffering because of them; otherwise thered be a staggering number of kids put up for adoption when they hit their school age years (a time that may be the most expensive). People who think of the benefit of children should not have them; this is how children end up feeling unloved and neglected. People who choose to wait until they are 40-50-years-old to have children are selfish, how is it possible that you will have as much energy as your 25-year-old counterparts to run around after a toddler or play basketball with your 10-year-old?
We have four kids. In order to make this work you simply have to get used to doing with less. You are not going to have the house of your dreams because your mortgage payment should be 25% of your monthly take home, your kids will save birthday money to buy their basketball shoes, you will drive used cars and save on car insurance. You will not have a big screen TV. You will shop at Sams Club. You will get very creative with hamburger and flank steak. You will get very handy at home repairs and growing a garden. You will take the kids to Disney World -- once. You will trade clothes with friends. And, in short, you will not be rich in money and possessions, but you will have had the benefit of living a simple, hard, learning and experience-filled life. If you are even weighing the economic cost of kids please do yourself and the kids a favor, and do not have any. After all it really isnt about you.
Editor's note: Letters may have been edited for grammar or spelling. Due to space considerations, some letters have been condensed and are not presented in their entirety. The views and opinions expressed in the letters are those of the authors and not necessarily those of MSN Money.
Send your comments to: investor@microsoft.com.
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